Inmates of Santa Maria Clinic
by AlfredTheHero
Summary: Human AU: When Feliciano Vargas gets thrown into a group of mentally unstable teenagers after ultimately trying to end his own life, he finds solace in the pain they all share. But the medics at the Spanish clinic don't seem all too interested in actually helping their "patients". Pairings used: GerIta, USUK, Franada, Rochu, Spamano, slight SuFin and Giripan OCs used/mentioned
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Beware, suicide, homicide, character death, and possible sexual content will be in this story.**

Feliciano hadn't meant for it to end this way. He'd always imagined he'd go peacefully in his sleep after a long, happy life. There'd be angels at the pearly gates as he entered Heaven, and he'd see everyone he loved again. They'd all be together again, they'd be happy again.

It didn't turn out that way. He was young, fifteen years old with a promising future ahead. It had not been a happy fifteen years though.

First his parents died when he was four-he didn't remember them very well. Next to go was his beloved Nanno when he was ten. Then the government took his fratello away. He had been deemed a danger to himself and others; he was sent to a hospital for those with... problems. That had been two years ago. Feliciano found it hard to hold on after that, but then the kicker came. His first love died.

His love had moved away, but they had still talked-sending letters every so often. Then the letters stopped. Feliciano had still hoped his love would return, but then he caught a glimpse of an international news feed. A horrible wreck had killed three people, mortally wounded four, and injured another five. Feliciano's love was one of the dead.

That's when he gave up. The pain was intense. He had stabbed himself in the stomach. A gaping wound that gushed out deep crimson blood that stained his entire body and his bed. Darkness consumed him.

When he opened his eyes, he didn't recognize anything. The ceiling and walls were grey, and so was the blanket he was laying under. Feliciano propped himself up groggily and looked around the room. It was small and unadorned. The only furniture was his bed and another bed identical to his own. It didn't look like anyone else was there though. A searing pain ran through his stomach as he tried to sit up completely.

_ Oh yeah..._ he thought, his mind nearly mush._ I stabbed myself._ It was almost hard for him to believe he was alive. It had hurt so much and there was so much blood he could've sworn he was a goner. Apparently not though. He lifted an arm to rub his eyes and jumped at the sight of an IV in his arm. It connected him to a bag with a clear liquid in it. Feliciano had no clue what was in the bag, but whatever it was, it wasn't a pain killer. If it was-it wasn't a good one.

"Are you awake?" A voice asked from across the room, causing Feliciano to jump again. He looked nervously over to the bed on the other side of the room. Sitting up in it, was a muscular, blonde boy with bright, ice blue eyes. He had a strong jaw line and brow. His bare arms were thick, and Feliciano found himself wishing he wasn't wearing the black tank top that hid the muscles that were obviously underneath. Strange.

"Ciao. I-I'm Feliciano... Please don't hurt me." He whimpered, pulling the blanket up so only his face at the eyes showed. He didn't think the handsome stranger would hurt him, but one could never be too careful.

"Ludwig." The stranger said, a thick German accent was present in his voice, "I thought you'd be begging me to take your life. That's what most of the people here want... To die." He looked over at the young Italian boy. Their eyes met and Feliciano was instantly glad that the blanket covered most of his face-his cheeks had turned bright red.

"Umm... Luddy?" Feliciano asked nervously.

"Don't call me that." Ludwig growled, "but what?"

"Um, where am I?" He had no clue what had happened to him after he passed out. Ludwig hesitated for a moment before answering.

"We're in a mental hospital. Supposedly the best in the world." He answered, "Santa Maria Mental Clinic." Ludwig sighed the name. It was constantly being mentioned in international news. The Spanish hospital was famous for rehabilitating people with mental disabilities and psychological problems.

"Oh... Someone must have found me in my room..." Feliciano dropped the blanket and looked down.

"Ja, must have. You've been here for a couple days now." Ludwig stood up out of his bed and stretched. Feliciano watched, noting how strong the other boy looked. His shirt was tight, and pants loose. The outfit looked comfortable on him. It was completely black though, definitely not in Feliciano's taste. He preferred colors.

"So, why are you here, Luddy?" Feliciano asked, trying to keep a conversation going so it wouldn't turn awkward. Ludwig glared at him as if he'd asked the not obvious question in the world.

"I told you not to call me that, but I'm in for the same thing as you."

_ So he's in for suicide too... _Feliciano thought, becoming slightly depressed. The thought of the handsome boy trying to kill himself was depressing for some reason. The question and answer filled the room with tension. It was awkward. Exactly what Feliciano had been trying to avoid.

"So, how old are you?" He blurted out the question, wanting the awkwardness to go away.

"16, but if you want to know more about me, you can wait until the warden comes to get us-we should be having a little group meeting later." Feliciano was confused by this a little. Was this guy insane, or were there more people that he were going to meet? He hoped it was the latter. It seemed that he was going to be sharing a room with Ludwig, and Feliciano wouldn't be thrilled to have an insane roommate.

It turned out that Ludwig wasn't crazy, because half an hour later a thin man with wavy red hair came into the unadorned grey dorm room. Ludwig instantly stood up in recognition when he saw the man.

_ That must be the "warden" Luddy was talking about._ Feliciano realized, sitting up to look at him. The man was wearing a doctor's lab coat, but not scrubs the way most medical professional did in the workplace. Instead fitted khakis and a green sweater hung on the man's form. He walked over to Feliciano and placed a hand on the boy's forehead.

"I'm glad to see that you're awake, and that you're fever is gone." He had a friendly voice and smile, "now let's take that IV out." He asked Feliciano to hold his arm out, which he did. The IV was out of his arm in seconds. Feliciano rubbed the spot where it had been, it stung slightly. The man put a band-aid over it and held a hand out to the brunette boy. "My name is Dr. Rodriguez." He introduced himself and smiled again.

"I'm Feliciano." The boy smiled and bounced in his bed.

"It's good to meet you, Feliciano, I expect Ludwig has already introduced himself?"

"Yup! Luddy introduced himself when I woke up."

"Good. Now come on you two." He walked to the door and motioned for them to follow. Ludwig followed, eager to get out of the room. Feliciano followed after him, curious as to where they were going. Probably that "little group meeting" Ludwig had been talking about.

That was exactly where Dr. Rodriguez was taking them. They were led through a few green-and-blue painted hallways that were lined with windows to a large door that was locked from the outside. An electronic keypad was the lock. Dr. Rodriguez unlocked the door with a credit-card shaped key and opened the door. Ludwig smiled slightly and waved at the 7 people who were already there. Feliciano followed him inside, nervously.

The room was painted a light turquoise and was occupied by teenage males. They varied in size, but they were all larger than Feliciano. He waved shyly at them, wishing he could sit down by Ludwig, whom he'd grown accustomed to. Unfortunately Ludwig was sitting in the corner next to a lean boy with red eyes and white hair.

"This is Feliciano." Dr. Rodriguez announced, "I know not everyone's in here, but once they do get here, please introduce yourselves." He then left the room, leaving Feliciano feeling defenseless and scared.

Then the largest of the group stood up. He had violet eyes and a large nose. His hair was a very dirty blonde, and the bottom part of his face was covered by a large scarf. The boy walked over to Feliciano. Cruelty loomed in his eyes and he radiated an aura of malice. The small Italian boy shivered and shied away. Was he planning on hurting him?


	2. Chapter 2

Feliciano gulped as the boy smiled and looked down at him. He felt like screaming and running away, and tried to make himself run to Ludwig-who so far was the only person who made him feel anywhere close to safe-and hide, but his legs wouldn't obey.

"Become one, da?" the boy asked, still smiling. He'd have been cute had it not been for the aura of malice radiating from him. Whatever this "become one" stuff meant, Feliciano didn't like the sound of it. It sounded scary. Scary things didn't really agree with him. The boy asked, "da?" again. He had a unique voice that Feliciano could not place as either high, nor low, but it obviously belonged to a Russian. That little fact given away by his thick accent.

"Leave the poor boy alone, Ivan!" a voice laced with a southern (American) accent called from behind, "No one wants to, "become one", okay?" Ivan glared over Feliciano's shoulder at the boy speaking. Feliciano shuddered at the ice in the stare. The boy who had spoken came right up to them, though, completely ignoring Ivan's death stare. Feliciano looked over to see a blond boy with blue eyes standing beside him. He was nearly as tall as Ivan, and wore a brown bomber jacket with the number 50 on the back. It was quickly decided in the Italian's mind that this boy was exceptionally brave. Ivan looked at him like he was exceptionally stupid, though.

"Why don't you just fuck off, okay Alfred?" the Russian asked, still smiling, and glaring. Alfred glared back from under rectangular glasses.

"No, I don't think I will, thank ya' very much." He smiled falsely and wrapped an arm around Feliciano, "Come with me, newbie." Alfred's tone was much nicer speaking to Feliciano than Ivan. The pair obviously did not like each other. He led the Italian over to a pair of boys sitting on either side of a plush polar bear, near the door. Both were blond, but other than that had nothing in common that Feliciano could identify.

One looked up and smiled at the Italian. His hair was long and tied back in a low, loose ponytail with a blue ribbon that matched the shade of his eyes. The blue shirt he wore also matched, although the bright red jeans threw Feliciano off a bit. Strange that such clothing was allowed in a mental hospital.

The other just glanced up at Feliciano with emerald green irises that were very well roofed by eyebrows the size of gerbils. He didn't look very happy. This boy was significantly smaller than both Alfred and Ivan, who were about the same size, and slightly smaller than the boy sitting closest to him. Feliciano was pretty sure he was still bigger than him though. He didn't seem too friendly. This is the one Alfred sat him by.

"Okie dokie!" Alfred stepped into the middle of the room and looked around, "Roll call!" he cried, the boy next to Feliciano groaned, "Okay! We've got our Germans," he pointed to Ludwig and the boy next to him, "the Russian," he glowered at Ivan, "the Swedish mute," he smiled at a large, stoney-faced boy who sat at the opposite side of the room from Feliciano, "our Frenchie," the boy with the ponytail scoffed as he was mentioned, "ummm... Where is Matthew?" he asked, looking confused at the bear.

"My sweet Canadian is here, don't worry." the French boy smiled over at the bear. Feliciano almost laughed. There wasn't anything but a stuffed polar bear there between the blue eyed and green eyed boys.

Alfred slapped his own forehead as he heard the French boy's words, "Of course he is, sorry Mattie!" he laughed awkwardly, "Well, our noob is here, and so is the hero" he jabbed a thumb in his own direction as he winked at Feliciano and mouthed, "me." Apparently Alfred referred to himself as the "hero." Feliciano giggled. Such a silly title. "And, I see my beautiful Brit."Alfred smiled and bowed slightly towards the boy sitting next to Feliciano. Feliciano fought back a giggling fit as the Brit's face flushed red.

"G-git!" the Brit managed to stammer out, but the insult didn't even register on the American's face.

"Let's see, we have eleven then." Ludwig piped up from his corner,

"Natalia probably won't join us after last week's incident," Ivan's face turned white at the mention of this "incident", Feliciano would have to remember to ask Ludwig about this "incident" later. "So, that means we're missing two." Alfred nodded in confirmation. The group numbered twelve, and as of now, two of their number were missing. No one seemed to think much of this.

"Yup, they should be here soon. Let's hold out on introductions until they get here." Everyone nodded in agreement to Alfred's decision.

.

The next thirty minutes were spent in awkward silence, only interrupted by the occasional insult from the Brit to his American pursuer. Alfred had sat himself in front of "his beautiful Brit" after finishing roll call. Feliciano found himself giggling at the pair, when he wasn't sneaking peeks at Ludwig. The German was awfully good looking. But then, the large steel door opened for the first time since Feliciano and Ludwig were deposited into the room.

"Pero Lovi!" a voice whined from outside the door. A scowling boy stormed into the room. He had dark brown hair and his chocolate eyes that were filled with anger and embarrassment. His indignation was obvious in the redness of his cheeks. Following him was another brunette boy. This one with eyes as green as new grass. He was the boy who had spoken, and whatever he had done before entering had upset "Lovi," apparently.

"Leave me alone, bastardo!" Lovi cried, turning around and giving the other boy the bird. Feliciano squinted at Lovi, he looked familiar. He couldn't put his finger on it though. He knew Lovi.

"There's no need to be mean querido!" the boy who had followed Lovi into the room pouted. This seemed only to annoy him more.

"Oh mio dio! Don't call me querido, stupido!"Lovi yelled back, flipping off his companion yet again, with both hands this time.

Feliciano knew where he knew Lovi from. "Fratello!" he cried, throwing himself at the brunette. The other boy seemed confused at first, then his eyes widened as he realized who it was hugging him.

"F-feli!?" he cried, his attention no longer on the boy who had come in with him, "Feli! Why the hell are you here!?" the surprise in his eyes turned to fury.

"Let's not focus on that fratello! I missed you~!" Feliciano rubbed a cheek against his brother's, causing the latter to flinch away. Everyone else in the room watched the scene with a mixture of surprise and confusion.

"Well then!" Alfred said, confused, "I guess that's one less introduction we need to make then. Well, I guess we'd all better introduce ourselves to the new guy." Lovi successfully pushed his brother off of him and sat down by the Swedish boy. His tormentor followed and placed himself next to Lovi. Feliciano followed as well and squeezed himself between the pair so he could continue to hold onto his big brother.

In the next hour Feliciano learned everyone's names, ages, and the reason they were in Santa Maria's.

Alfred was seventeen, and in for attempted suicide.

The Brit was named Arthur, was nineteen years of age, and had been sent to the clinic for an attempted homicide-suicide.

Francis, a.k.a, "Frenchie", was also nineteen and had attempted to take his own life.

The Canadian (who had suddenly appeared, much to Feliciano's surprise) called Matthew was seventeen and was also in for trying to end his life. He was also Alfred's half brother.

The albino boy Ludwig was sitting by was his older brother, Gilbert. He was eighteen and in for attempted suicide and almost murdering a boy in his high school. He didn't seem too ashamed of it either.

Ludwig was in for several attempted suicides. Fifteen in the last year before he was taken in. Two since he'd been in the clinic. He was almost seventeen.

The Swedish boy was named Berwald. He was homicidal and suicidal at seventeen. After that he went back to being a recluse.

Ivan was twenty. A little too old to be in the wing generally reserved to hold teenagers, but he'd been in there for ten years. The Russian was homicidal. That wasn't any kind of surprise to Felicicano.

Lovi-short for Lovino-was in for attempted murder and suicide. This was one of the few things Feliciano didn't know about his brother. He was only a year older than Feliciano, and the two had been close before Lovino had been taken away.

The brunette who had followed Lovino in was "en por intento de homocidio." Apparently the eighteen year-old was just the tiniest bit insane. Alfred had to translate the sentence for Feliciano, telling him that, "Antonio was in for attempted homicide." Antonio was the only one of the twelve in the room who was from Spain, and had a habit of speaking Spanish randomly in conversations-even though he was fluent in English, which was the common language in the room. Alfred was the only one who also spoke Spanish and translated for Antonio.

Once all the introductions had been made, Lovino once again pushed his brother off of him and into the middle of the room. The little Italian was nervous looking around the room. Everyone was staring at him as if expecting something.

"Aren't you going to introduce yourself noob?" Alfred asked.

"Uh... Um... Ciao, I'm Feliciano Veneziano Vargas... I-I'm fifteen, and... and I'mhereforattemptingsuicide." the words came out of his mouth in a quick jumble of sounds. The rest of the room's occupants mumbled a collective,

"Hello Feliciano." like they were some sort of addicts support group, which in a way, he guessed they kind of were.

They all began talking about seemingly random things. Alfred, Arthur, Francis, and Matthew sat and gossiped. Feliciano was pretty sure he heard them talking about a pair of men named Kiku and Heracles. Apparently they were both therapists working at the institute, and were rumored to be dating. The German brothers were arguing about who knows what in German so no one else could understand. Antonio was trying to pull Lovino away from Feliciano so he could hug him, and Lovino was trying to push both of them away while yelling insults every chance he got.

This continued for about twenty minutes before the door opened once more. Everyone in the room went tense. Everyone except Ivan and Feliciano anyway. The Russian looked hopeful, while the others were trying to blend into the wall. Feliciano didn't know why they were all so scared, it was just Dr. Rodriguez. He wasn't scary.

"Ivan," he motioned for the Russian boy to follow him. Feliciano didn't like the way he said and motioned it. It reminded him of a doctor's office. Feliciano wasn't a big fan of doctors. Ivan jumped up and almost ran to Dr. Rodriguez. As soon as Ivan had been called and they had left everyone else relaxed.

"Where is Dr. Rodriguez taking him?" Feliciano asked, a little nervous.

"His psychiatrist." Ludwig answered, sending a little shiver down Feliciano's spine. Psychiatrists were doctors, right?

"Oh." he gulped, holding onto his brother tighter.

"Thanks potato-bastard." Lovino growled, "You've scared him."

"Don't be mean to Luddy, fratello!" Feliciano pouted. Lovino rolled his eyes, "So... Why did they take Ivan?" he asked timidly. All the attention was on Feliciano now.

"They're going to... Well, I don't really feel comfortable talking about what him and Yoa are probably doing." Arthur piped in.

"Then leave the explaining to moi." Francis offered. His offer was quickly rejected by the rest of the group. Chattering began again and Feliciano quickly learned that Ivan and Yoa had a... _special_ relationship.

The chattering had just begun to die down as the door opened again. The room was suddenly plunged into another tense silence. A young woman, presumably a doctor, walked into the room. She had warm green eyes and soft looking brown hair. Unlike Dr. Rodriguez she did not wear a lab coat, instead she wore a green dress that's hem ended a little past her knees. Feliciano found that she was not as scary as the others' reactions would have made him believe. In fact, he thought she was quite pretty.

"Feliciano?" she asked, and his heart leapt into his throat, "Please come with me." Shaking, he stood up and began to walk out of the room with her. As they left the room, he looked over his shoulder back at Lovino, and then Ludwig. Both looked like they felt sorry for him.

.

**Author's Note: Well, sorry that this chapter is kind of long... I couldn't find a good stopping point and wanted to introduce all of the "inmates." A quick thank you to Inepto who reviewed the first chapter. Thanks for the support! 3**

**Please review! ^_^**


	3. Chapter 3

Feliciano followed the woman down two hallways before she said anything.

"How have you liked it here so far?" she asked as if this was some kind of vacation he should have been enjoying.

"It's kind of boring, and gloomy." He told her, looking down at the floor as they walked, "But I like all the people I've met so far. The boys in the room you just took me from are funny, and my fratello is there! But Ivan is scary." She laughed as he rambled on.

"Well you seem perky enough. I hope you get out of here soon." She looked over her shoulder at him and smiled.

"What's your name?"

"Elizaveta. I'm your shrink." Feliciano cringed a bit at the sound of the word shrink.

"It's nice to meet you Miss Elizaveta." He bounced on his heels and smiled at her. She returned it. Her smile calmed Feliciano a bit. She didn't seem as scary as he had thought all doctors were.

They walked down another hall and down three flights of stairs in relative silence. Doors littered either side of each hall. Feliciano was a little afraid to ask where they led to, but every once in a while a man or woman in a lab coat or with a name tag identifying them as a faculty member emerged from a room. Sometimes they had a patient in tow. They all seemed melancholy. One particular patient, a very pretty young woman with a big bow in her blond hair who came out with another young woman-this one with a very large bosom-was yelling bloody murder and something about her big brother. Her therapist seemed very scared, and Feliciano shared her fear.

When things like that happened Elizaveta hurried Feliciano away until they were in a hallway with a double glass door at the end. Feliciano's heart skipped a beat. He could see daylight! The Sun. Everything inside was so dim and grey, he couldn't help but long for the light. Unfortunately she opened a door halfway down the hall and led him in.

At least this room had some color to it. It was a lot smaller than it looked. Elizaveta led him to a small orange couch. She sat across from him in a red armchair. Feliciano plopped down on the love seat. It was comfy, and springy. He found himself bouncing on the cushions. Man, how long had it been since he'd felt happy enough to do that? Elizaveta giggled at the silliness.

"You know why you're here, right Feliciano?" she asked, ruining his moment of bouncy happiness. He immediately stopped, looking down at the floor, which had a carpet that looked almost exactly like grass. Geez he wished it was grass.

Feliciano nodded at her question, "Because I tried to kill myself, right?" The light that usually inhabited his hazel eyes was missing. Just thinking about what he had tried to do brought back the feeling of hopelessness and loneliness he had been trying to escape.

Elizaveta smiled sadly. "Yes, but more because we need to find out why you tried."Feliciano didn't look up at her as she talked. He already knew why he had tried. Everyone he loved had left him. He'd been alone and he wanted it to end. He wanted to join his nonno and parents in death. He wanted to see his first love again. Maybe he never would have seen Lovino again if he had died, but at least he would have stopped hurting.

"Feliciano, can you tell me how you felt?" He snapped out of his own thoughts when she began talking again. How had he felt? Where to begin?

"I felt... Sad. Hopeless. Lonely. I hurt. My entire body hurt and I cried more than I can ever remember crying before."Feliciano's voice was barely a whisper, but Elizaveta seemed to have understood what he said.

She nodded her head. "Mhm, it sounds to me as if you were feeling abandoned. Is that true?" She asked as if she already knew the answer, and she might as well have known. That was exactly how Feliciano had felt, abandoned. Abandoned by the people he loved the most in the world. What had he ever done to deserve that?

"Yeah, I guess." He pulled his knees to his chest and looked down at them.

_I thought therapists were supposed to help you feel better?_ He thought, pouting into his knees as he did. Tears were beginning to form in the corners of his eyes. He didn't want them there, and tried burying his head between his knees to make them go away. The only thing that managed to do was make his already unruly hair even messier. At least the curl that never went down wouldn't be so noticeable. Not that he really minded the unruly curl.

"Oh! I didn't mean to make you cry!" Elizaveta shouted, before jumping up and running over to the small boy. She wrapped her arms around his shaking form. Feliciano looked up at her. Tears clung to his cheeks and his tip of his nose was wet. She wiped forming tears away from his eyes. "How about I stop being a psychiatrist right now?" She asked him.

"Please?" Feliciano answered. He didn't really think it was possible for her to stop being a psychiatrist, but if it would stop her from reminding him about all the horrible feelings he wanted to forget, he didn't care if it was possible or not.

"Then come on." Elizaveta smiled and motioned for Feliciano to follow as she got up off the couch. He did.

She led him back out of the room and up a flight of stairs. This room was painted white, and much bigger than any other room he'd been in so far. Soft looking chairs and several recreational items filled the room, but they were the only people in it. Feliciano found this a little confusing, but that didn't stop him from wandering into the room and finding paint supplies.

"What is this room, Miss Elizaveta?"Feliciano asked, holding a blank canvas up to his chest.

"It's supposed to be a recreation room, but we're only allowed to have one patient in at a time." She sighed. Feliciano looked down at the canvas and wished his fratello could be there. Even if he would have only criticized anything Feliciano decided to paint. Their nonno had always said that Lovino was jealous of Feliciano's painting skills and that was why he always said such mean things about his paintings. Feliciano wouldn't have minded the insults though. Not if it meant spending time with Lovino.

"Is it okay if I paint?" He asked, placing the canvas on an easel before grabbing a brush and paint tubes. Elizaveta nodded her head and made her way to Feliciano. "Are you going to watch?" He smiled as he squirted some paint out on a pallet.

"I would love to." She pulled a seat up behind him.

Twenty minutes later he had a halfway finished painting of a flower garden. He was in love with it so far. Shades of purple, red, and blue were accented in the shades of green that made up the majority of the painting. Elizaveta seemed no less entranced with the painting than him.

"It's beautiful, Feliciano." She whispered.

"It's not done." He giggled. The bouncy happy feeling he had when he was on the couch earlier was back. He was bouncing again. This time on the balls of his feet.

Before he knew it Elizaveta was telling him that it was time to leave.

"But! But! I'm not finished!" Feliciano pouted. His painting was so close to finished, but it still needed some finishing details.

"You can finish the next time I see you, okay?" She smiled and took ahold of his forearm. Feliciano sighed. He wanted to finish his painting. Reluctantly, he allowed her to lead him back up the staircase and through the hallways until he was back in the turquoise room where he had first been led.

"Good-bye Feliciano." Elizaveta smiled and hugged the little Italian, "We will have to do more therapy next time." Feliciano pouted. He'd actually enjoyed most of this experience, but he didn't believe he would enjoy it if they actually had to go through a therapy session. He'd probably cry again. Feliciano didn't like to cry. What sane man did?

"Ciao Miss Elizaveta!" Feliciano waved enthusiastically as Elizaveta left him in the turquoise room. He then turned and sat back down between Lovino and Antonio. Antonio pouted as the younger Vargas brother made a barrier between the two.

Feliciano snuggled up to his brother who immediately began trying to push him away. He didn't care though. Eventually Lovino stopped fighting against him and Feliciano fell soundly asleep on his fratello's shoulder.

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who has followed, favorited, and/or reviewed! I love you all~! Heheh... I really don't love this chapter like I wish I could. -_-**


	4. Chapter 4

When Feliciano woke up, Alfred's face was inches from his. The blonde looked like he'd been waiting for quite a while for him to wake up.

"Good morning, Feliciano!" He laughed, pulling away slightly so Feliciano had some breathing room.

"H-how long was I asleep!?" Feliciano asked, freaking out slightly. He looked around the room frantically. Berwald and Matthew were now gone, and Ivan hadn't come back yet. Everyone present in the room was looking at him expectantly.

"Ahaha! I was just joking." Alfred laughed, pushing a deformed pastry in the Italian's face, "Here, me and Tonio made them..." Feliciano took it cautiously. The pastry didn't look very appetizing, and he couldn't really tell what it was supposed to be.

"Uh, uh... Grazie?" Feliciano wasn't really sure how he should feel about the gesture.

"De nada." Antonio answered from beside him. A cheerful smile spread across the Spaniard's tanned face. A snort came from the other side of the room. Feliciano looked up from the unidentifiable pastry to Francis who was scoffing at the idea of Alfred and Antonio making anything edible.

"How'd you get access to the kitchen?" Gilbert asked the pair.

"Well, Anica is sick, so Kiku took over my session for today," Alfred began to explain.

"So when we were called out we convinced Kiku and Heracles to let us go to the kitchen... It didn't take much." Antonio added to Alfred's story. These were the first words of English Feliciano had heard the Spaniard speak since he'd entered the room with Lovino.

"Of course it didn't. They wanted some alone time." Francis winked suggestively. Everyone else groaned, but didn't argue. Feliciano faintly remembered someone saying something about the pair of psychiatrists were dating.

Twenty minutes went by before the attention in the room returned to Feliciano and his unidentifiable pastry. It looked like he'd have to eat it. Great. He gave the thing a good long stare-down. It was a grayish color and had fallen in on itself. Feliciano didn't want to eat it. Not in the slightest. But Antonio was giving him the biggest smile he had ever seen and Alfred looked so hopeful and was even bouncing, he just had to.

So, cautiously he sniffed the pastry before taking a small bite. Surprisingly, it was actually good. Suddenly hungry, Feliciano scarfed it down. He hadn't realized how hungry he was until then. Man, it must have been days since he'd last eaten.

His enthusiasm when eating the pastry (which was supposed to be a cupcake) earned him a bone-crushing hug from Antonio-and an evil glare from his brother. Alfred showed his appreciation by jumping up with joy before running over to Arthur and giving the surprised Englishman a very sloppy kiss. The sudden action earned the blondes a loud round of applause, several whistles, and even a cat-call from Gilbert. It also earned Alfred a string of insults coming from the beet-faced Brit. He just shook it off and said that he knew Arthur enjoyed it.

The room was very quiet when the commotion from the kiss died down. Well, at least it was until Feliciano's stomach growled loudly.

"Hungry much?" Lovino asked from his place beside Feliciano. The younger Vargas brother nodded his head vigorously.

"Si, when do we eat?" He asked, rubbing his stomach slightly.

"Well, it should be about twelve..." Gilbert said from the other side of the room. There was no real way for them to tell time as there were no clocks in the room and no one had a watch. "So we should be brought to the cafeteria for lunch in about an hour." Feliciano pouted at the answer. He would have to wait a whole HOUR before he got to eat? No fair!

* * *

Unsurprisingly, the hour Feliciano had to wait to eat went by dreadfully slow. He spent his time quietly, sparing peeks at Ludwig every once in a while. Sometimes it seemed like the young German was looking back, but his eyes always shifted before he could be sure.

Meanwhile Antonio was trying to reach over him to get to Lovino, who perpetually pushed him away. Cursing all the while of course. That made it a little hard to get a good steady look at Ludwig, unfortunately.

But after what seemed like an eternity of waiting, a pretty young woman with short brown hair and green eyes opened the door to their little room and the boys practically ran out of the room. The young lady didn't seemed phased as all the boys rushed past her. It was just part of the job.

* * *

The cafeteria looked like any standard high-school cafeteria. There were long rectangular tables and smaller circular tables scattered throughout the room, which was only slightly smaller than a small high-school cafeteria, and could sit about a hundred and fifty people. Plastic blue chairs surrounded all of the different tables. There were obvious cliques too. Great, it was just like school.

And just like school, he had to go through a ridiculously long line for food that was less than mediocre.

Once he had gone through the line and gotten his tray of mush, Feliciano awkwardly looked around the cafeteria. If he could find Lovino or Ludwig that would be best.

Oh yay! His little room was sitting together! Well, for the most part anyway. Berwald was sitting at another table with a boy with spiked hair and another very effeminate boy with a blue cross holding back his blonde bangs. Everyone else was crowded around a circular table near the back of the room.

Sheepishly he made his way to their table. Lovino was the only one to notice when he squeezed in next to Ludwig. The elder brother glared at the German, who was ignoring everything and picking at his food uninterestedly.

Feliciano took a huge bite of something that could have been mashed potatoes, but tasted like cardboard. Everything on his tray was gone in seconds. Not that it tasted good at all, he was just that hungry.

"Kesesesese! Looks like someone was hungry!" Gilbert laughed, looking over from his discussion with Antonio and Francis. Suddenly everyone was looking at him again. Feliciano could feel the eyes boring into his soul.

"That's what happens when you don't eat for a few days, Gil." Ludwig answered, rolling his eyes before returning to his food. Feliciano blushed and thanked him quickly and quietly. The German just grunted his welcome.

The entire cafeteria was crowded. People - mostly teenagers - sat at every table, half-heartidly eating their mush masquerading as food. Some looked like they were just fine and were carrying on completely normally as if they'd never had any reason to be there at all. An entire table stared down at their food, not eating or talking, just staring. They were probably horribly depressed, or very drugged. A few people were rough-housing, pushing and punching, obviously angry, but for no reason that Feliciano could see.

The majority was just like the table he sat at though. The teens sat around, talking, picking at their food. Some quieter than others, some making more of a ruckus like Gilbert.

Feliciano quickly decided that this was the strangest mental hospital he would never imagine. It didn't feel like he was in the psych-ward, not really. He hadn't been forced to take some kind of antidepressant, and there wasn't anyone drooling around like a zombie because they were on antidepressants. Surprisingly, he hadn't been presented with any kind of medical exam or even questions.

He should've known it was too good to be true.

It was only ten minutes after he had finished his food that Elizaveta came in and began looking for him. Feliciano had seen her before she saw him, and instinctively tried to hide himself by blending into Ludwig. The German gave him an odd look and pushed him away. On his other side was Arthur, and he didn't want to get that close to the grumpy Brit, so he cowered. Cowered and scooted closer to Ludwig again, feeling slightly safer when closer to the large boy.

Ludwig scowled and pushed Feliciano away again, but the little Italian didn't notice and began his trip over again.

"Stop it." He growled as Feliciano once again came close to him, and he once again pushed him away. The command was ignored.

But he didn't have to worry about it long because it was only a few seconds later that Elizaveta found him.

"Hey sweetie," She greeted him with a light touch on the shoulder, "I forgot some of the routine tests earlier, come with me please." She smiled and began to walk away. With a sigh, Feliciano got up and followed, recognizing that he had no other choice. As he walked away, he could hear Gilbert's voice following.

"Wow! Dude, **she's** your therapist? Lucky!" Feliciano could feel his face grow warm at the comment. He was kind of afraid of what Gilbert would do when he got back, but he was very afraid of what the routine tests were.

* * *

It turned out that all Elizaveta had to do was take a blood sample. Feliciano unfortunately didn't know his blood type, so a sample of blood was needed. Just in case something happened and he would need a blood transfusion. Feliciano really hoped that would never happen.

She brought him back to the turquoise room, where everyone was now that they had eaten.

Feliciano was immediately attacked by Gilbert.

"You are so lucky man! You got a hottie as your shrink!" He gushed, holding onto the startled Italian's shoulders with a death grip.

"Uuuhh..." Was all he could think to say.

"You're so lucky! All I've got is that stupid sissy-boy-man-girl, Roderich." He practically spat the last word. He was pouting at the unfairness of it all.

"Shut up, Gil." Ludwig piped up from his seat against the wall, rolling his eyes at his big brother's antics. "It's not like you've never seen her before, and just last week you were practically in love with Roderich." Gilbert's eyes narrowed as his brother spoke.

"No such thing ever happened, mien bruder." He growled, giving the younger sibling a death stare. Ludwig didn't seem phased. Feliciano admired the way he just stared back nonchalantly at his brother. He would have broken down crying.

Gilbert let go of Feliciano to confront his brother. The younger Vargas took the opportunity to run to his brother, who was once again being attacked and smothered by a certain Spaniard. The smaller of the two Italians couldn't cram himself between his brother and Antonio, so he just sat on Lovino's lap. Much to Lovino's aggravation.

"Fratello!" He cried as he landed on Lovino's lap.

"Get off of me, bastards!" Lovino yelled, struggling between the two teenaged boys who so determinably sandwiched him between them. The rest of the room laughed at Lovino's hopeless struggle.

* * *

Antics, arguments, gossip, and other normal teenager things went by in the five hours before they were taken back to the cafeteria for supper. It too was mush masquerading as food, but Feliciano ate it happily. Dinner went by without any therapists coming to do a medical exam. The only exam he got was a suspicious one from his brother when he caught him looking intently across the table at Ludwig. He immediately looked somewhere else.

* * *

After they had all eaten supper they were lead back to their individual rooms and locked in. Feliciano noticed for the first time that there was not a handle on his and Ludwig's side of the door. A sudden wave of panic rushed over him. He was trapped in the room. All night. At least he had Ludwig to keep him company, right?

That might have been fine had Ludwig actually shown any signs of wishing to interact with his roommate. Instead, the German went straight to his bed and laid down, covers over his head, hiding from the world.

"Luddy?" Feliciano asked, walking uncertainly towards Ludwig's bed. The German sat up and gave Feliciano a very annoyed look. He was just trying to be friendly and social, geez. Ludwig was making him nervous.

"I thought I told you not to call me that." He growled before laying back down with his back to Feliciano.

"Um, well," Feliciano replied, ignoring Ludwig's annoyance, "I wanted to ask you if my fratello is always so mean to you..." Yup, that's what he was going to go with. It was better than nothing to talk about, he guessed.

"If you mean calling me "potato bastard", then ja. Always." Ludwig sighed, "Now go away."

"But what about how he was glaring at you? It doesn't seem like he likes you much."

"Does he like anyone much?" Ludwig replied, annoyed by the conversation.

"Well, no..." Feliciano hadn't thought his topic out very well. Their conversation had just hit a dead-end. But instead of going to his bed and ignoring the awkward silence, he once again tried to start up conversation.

"Luddy?"

"I said, _don't call me that!_" Ludwig barked, springing up from the bed to glare down at the Italian. Feliciano gulped. Wow Ludwig was big. Had he always been that big? He was pretty sure the German had just grown in the last few seconds.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Feliciano cowered down on the floor, folding his arms over his head to act as a shield in case Ludwig decided to hit him. He would need the protection, based on the size of Ludwig's arms. They were like trees! And surely the German was the kind of person who knew his own strength.

The little brunette was braced for an impact that never came. When he got the courage to look up at his roommate, he found that Ludwig had gone back to sitting on his bed, and was looking at the Italian, amused.

"Did you think that I'd really hit you?" He asked, almost laughing.

"Well, si. The look you were giving me was scary and you're so big and you looked mad and I'm afraid a lot and I thought you were going to hit me so I ducked." Feliciano rambled on quickly. Leaving Ludwig to stare at him, confused, as if he hadn't caught a word of any of it. And he probably hadn't. Feliciano had a habit of speaking a million miles an hour when frightened.

"Feliciano, do me a favor, and SHUT UP." Ludwig growled. He was glaring again. His gaze went straight down his sharp nose and into the Italian's soul, or, so it seemed to the Italian in question.

"Uh... Oh, okay..." Feliciano mumbled, quickly scuttling backwards until he hit his own bed. In record time, he crawled up onto the hard mattress and hid beneath the gray sheets. He could still feel Ludwig glaring at him. But that didn't last for long as the German lost interest and went back to moping under his own covers.

Feliciano relaxed and let out the breath he didn't know he'd been holding. He was shaking as well, something else he'd failed to notice in his terror.

_Mio Dio Luddy is scary!_ Feliciano thought as he laid there. He hadn't really pegged his roommate as being really scary, just kind of grumpy. The German hadn't been like that earlier. He'd been grumpy and seemed a little annoyed with his new roommate, but he hadn't lashed out at all. Sure he'd pushed him away during lunch, but it wasn't like Feliciano hadn't deserved that - although he wished that he hadn't gotten pushed away - he had been in Ludwig's personal space after all. Way in his personal space.

* * *

They laid there in there, in complete and utter awkward silence for what seemed like an eternity to Feliciano, although it couldn't have been more than three hours. At that time, all the lights went out.

Feliciano let out a very girlish shriek as they did.

"Shut UP!" Yelled Ludwig from the other side of the room.

"But it-it's dark!" Feliciano replied in a panicked tone, "What happened to the lights? Is it a black out? Did we lose power? How long is it going to be dark? Are we stuck here? What if-"

"It's just lights out. Shut up and GO. TO. SLEEP." Ludwig commanded him, obviously annoyed.

"But, but, but!" Feliciano tried to argue, almost in tears.

"Don't tell me you're nyctophobic."

"Um... No, it's just that it's a new place and I don't feel comfortable, and you scared me, and I'm afraid of the dark." Feliciano cowered under his blanket, shivering and crying out of pure terror.

"That's what nyctophobia is." Ludwig muttered.

"Can I sleep with you?" Feliciano's hopeful question was answered by a long, pregnant silence, "Please Luddy! I mean, Ludwig! PLEASE?" He begged, desperately needing to cling to someone or something for reassurance. Back home he had a night light, and if it didn't work - power went out, lightbulb burned out, etc. - he would usually go sleep with his brother.

"_NIEN!_" Ludwig barked back at his roommate.

"But Luddy-I, erm-Ludwig!" Feliciano sobbed. Maybe calling Ludwig by his actual name and not the nickname he had been given would help Feliciano get on his good side. He HAD to get over there. His other choice was to have a panic attack.

Ludwig must have realized that, because after another long pause, he gave in with a heavy sigh.

"If it'll make you shut up."

Feliciano immediately sprang up from his bed and ran to Ludwig's, shouting his thanks continuously until he hit the bed and fell on top of something that he could only guess was Ludwig.

He guessed right. Groaning, Ludwig pushed the brunette off of him and moved over so they wouldn't have to sleep right on top of each other.

Feliciano burrowed under the sheets and followed Ludwig as he moved over, so he could feel the warmth of his roommate's body right next to him. Naturally, he was pushed away several times by Ludwig. Giving in to not being able to cuddle with the German as he would his brother if they were back home, Feliciano wrapped an arm around Ludwig's. And no matter how much the blond tried, he couldn't shake the little Italian, so he stopped trying. After two straight minutes of jerking his arm around as to dismount his unwanted guest.

They laid there in silence for about twenty minutes before Feliciano, once again, could not stand the silence.

"Lud-wig?" He asked, changing from 'Luddy' to 'Ludwig' mid-way into the word. Good thing they started the same.

"What?" Growled Ludwig's voice from beside him.

Feliciano racked his brains for something to talk about.

"What was the 'incident' that Alfred mentioned earlier?"

"Oh. _That._" Ludwig said the word as if it were acid. "Guess you need to know." Feliciano felt him shrug and turn so he was, presumably, facing him.

"Umm... I'm scared now." Feliciano muttered, using a second arm to wrap around Ludwig's bicep, and burying his face in his roommate's shoulder. Ludwig growled, but Feliciano held on.

"Let go." Feliciano didn't respond, "Verdammt. Well, okay. So the 'incident', as it has been nick-named, was an attack on a therapist by one of the people in our group. You did not meet her because she is being held in the clinic's version of solitary confinement. She's only allowed contact with her therapist. At least, that's our best guess."

"Eep!" Feliciano gripped Ludwig's arm tighter. Someone in their group attacked a therapist? He wasn't sure he wanted to go back to the group room ever again.

"Calm down." Ludwig ordered, "I'm trying to tell you a story."

"Sorry."

"Okay, so Natalya is obsessed with Ivan, which is exceptionally creepy because he's her older brother." Feliciano stared, wide-eyed at the spot where Ludwig was laying, even though he couldn't see him. "Well, as I'm sure you heard, Ivan has been, well, a couple of sorts with his psychiatrist, Yao, for a while now. As you can imagine, when Natalya caught wind of it she was _not_ happy. In fact, she went on a little rampage..." He trailed off as if mentally revisiting that day.

"Ludwig?" Feliciano asked, when the German didn't continue for a minute.

"Oh, yeah. It was terrifying to say the least. I thought Ivan was going to shit his pants. She was screaming curses and threats. I thought she was going to kill someone." Ludwig's voice quivered a little as he recalled the story, "And naturally this is the time when Yao comes calling for Ivan." Feliciano gulped. "Well, as she's already insane and very much angry, Natalya turned on the man as she saw as the source of the problem. Next thing we all know, Yao is on the ground and Natalya is strangling him." Feliciano felt Ludwig shudder at the memory. "It took Ivan and Alfred to pry her off of him and hold her back so she wouldn't kill him. Once he was over the shock, Yao ran to get someone and they took Natalya off. It's been two weeks since we've seen her."

Feliciano was pressed up against Ludwig as much as he could.

"I hope I never meet her." He whispered. This Natalya lady sounded scarier than her brother. And he had scared the shit out of him earlier. Not only did she sound scary though, apparently she scared everyone else too. Even Ludwig!

"Maybe you won't. I don't know if she'll be brought back to our group. Now go to sleep." With that Ludwig turned back over on his back and all was quiet once more.

Feliciano tried, and failed, several more times to snuggle up to Ludwig. The German was determined not to let the Italian get any closer than he already had.

So Feliciano dozed on Ludwig's shoulder until the blond's breathing became even. Once he was sure the other was asleep, Feliciano slipped under Ludwig's arm and laid his head on... Feliciano felt his face flush red. He had laid his head on Ludwig's bare chest. The blond must have removed his shirt in the time before he let Feliciano into his bed. Not that he was complaining or anything...

Ludwig shifted as Feliciano wrapped an arm around his heavily muscled chest. He held his breath, sure that he'd get yelled at, but Ludwig was still asleep. He was safe.

So, with his head on Ludwig's chest, his ear pressed to the warm skin right above his heart, Feliciano slowly fell asleep.

* * *

**A/N: WOOHOO! I FINALLY FINISHED THIS CHAPTER!**

**It only took me... A lot longer than it should have. Sorry for the wait. Please don't hate me too much. ^^;**

**Please Review. ^_^**


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